My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize