yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
