he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
