it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
the day after is always just damage control
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
