Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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