Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
