Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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