Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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