I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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