I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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