Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
