If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
