Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Found the puke drawer
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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