You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
