I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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