Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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