Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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