I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
