remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize