i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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