they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
