I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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