i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
