tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize