so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
