Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
