Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
