You're completely useless in the revolution.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
