your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
