TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
