I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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