Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
