You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
