We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
