Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
