i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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