worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
