i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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