I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
