whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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