return my video game
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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