Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
