Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
