I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
All the doctor said was why
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
