someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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