i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
