I accidentally had phone sex last night
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
