Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Randomize
