he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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