Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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