they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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