evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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